@CauseWereGuys: Me: I'm happy right now. Life: lol, one sec bro
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@JPHaddadio: Don't you hate when you take a power nap and wake up 22 hours later and everybody at work is staring at you?
@NYC_Blonde: I enjoy April Fool's Day because I like responding to fake pregnancy announcement texts with "no wonder you've been looking chubby".
@Nahdude83: Give a man a fish & he'll eat for a day. Give a man a jelly fish and you can pee on him.
@causticbob: I hate it when people say "Oh, I'm a vegetarian except for fish". Yeah? And I'm a non-smoker except for cigarettes. #WorldVeganDay