@clindsaysway: Meant to say, "Let me check my calendar and get back to you." What came out: "I'm available anytime"
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@amishschool: Political analyst said the way to defeat ISIS is to cripple them financially so maybe we can sneak into Syria and build them a Whole Foods.
@iamspacegirl: "Makin all the ladies drop they panties" I brag, pulling the fire alarm at Victoria's Secret.
@Midgetspar: Being a "Hopeless Romantic" sounds kinda depressing. "Pull my chair out for me?" .. "I'd love to, but I've given up."