@HandyJack420: Miley Cyrus has her tongue out more than Jabba the Hutt.
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@ALF_from_TV: Me: My flight was canceled so I won't be home until tomorrow. Her: but you said you were just going out for milk.
@PaulShakeySharp: Ive just finished writing my first ever childrens novel. It's called 'We're poor because of you'.
@darinlovesbacon: I once stayed in a motel that was so seedy, the Bible in the drawer only had 7 commandments