@PaulyPeligroso: Million Dollar Idea: Teach pugs to DJ, create a new genre of music...pugstep.
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@CourtneyBale: Bear of bad news: Hey, sport. You might wanna be sitting down. Ready? Oh god how do I put this? I'm gonna have to maul the shit out of you.
@Jacob_Swift16: You know you're the family addict when it's time to light birthday candles & everyone looks at you knowing you have a lighter in your pocket
@VirgoSherry: A co-worker just used the word "elderly" to describe someone my age and that's why I had to kill her.