@SeanBlazed: Miss someone? Paint a helium balloon like their face. Deflate it. Put it in your back pocket. They're still gone and that was weird advice.
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@JohnLyonTweets: Magician: I need a volunteer. [man stands] Not you. [woman stands] Not you. GARY GET UP HERE! [Gary goes up] We've never met before, right?
@ClichedOut: [Sesame Street casting] Exec: ok, what kid role models do we have A grouch, cookie addict, and 2 jobless roommates Exec: Nice, let's roll