@froghammer: Mom, dad... I'm gay. I didn't know either, someone on the internet told me
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@LurkAtHomeMom: I didn't have time to have my coffee before drop off this morning. Anyway. Hopefully I brought them to the right school.
@williamwanton: Couples that stay fit together don't trust each other enough to go to the gym alone
@RobDenBleyker: Finally watching Michael Bay's TMNT. Best part so far is a dude answering a Skype call and yelling "How did you get this number?!?"