@Liam26x: Annoys me when I'm typing my reply and someone starts typing like you see those 3 bubbles and I'm just like no excuse me wait your turn thanks

@the_kizzle: if you meet an american who knows anything about the metric system, you have met a drug user.

@ObscureGent: Mother in law just said global warming with air quotes. It's going to be a long night.

@markydoodoo: [Shark Tank] INVESTOR: So, it's a bra, with a built in queso holder? ME: Yep INVESTOR: And you call it the- ME: The Bracho, yes

@iGreenMonk: I really can't believe the price some women pay for sunglasses. I'm starting to think it'd be cheaper to get the kitchen window tinted.