@nicfit75: My 8yo's looking for a summer job. He's a pretty decent bartender if anyone's hiring.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MacAnnabella: People that proudly carry their yoga mats around town... I get it. I carry my Burrito around with that same pride.
@TheMichaelRock: I just found my old Nokia phone from 2003. It still has 87% battery life left.
@EJGomez: "We can't hire you. We're trying to get more diverse" ME: But I'm Hispanic [A bear walks in wearing a fresh Hooters outfit] ME: Aw man
@cwhudson: SURGEON: hold on, i just need to YouTube this part of the procedure PHONE: *unskippable ad plays* NURSE: he's dyin SURGEON: ah crap, hold on