@KoKeniSasquatch: My autocorrect changed epi to epic so this death is gonna be awesome.
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@shutupmikeginn: If you get engaged and you and your partner both owns dogs do the dogs become brother and sister or are they married too?
@daemonic3: Can you believe some cultures still communicate with clicky noises or primitive hieroglyphs? *clicks keyboard furiously* *adds 17 emojis*
@themiltron: interviewer: why do you want this job me: i've just always been very passionate about not starving to death
@djdarrellripley: Me: I grew a beard once & It actually looked just like yours. Him: Why'd you shave it off? Me: I just told you...