@ShaeAaron: My bra is off, my pajamas are on, my hair is up. I'm not sure if I'm going to bed, or to Walmart.
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@Brianhopecomedy: "Daddy, how do you spell Budweiser?" "Uhhh....why?" "I'm drawing a picture of you for school." "Cool! It's spelled G-A-T-O-R-A-D-E."
@realHamOnWry: Kids should think twice about threatening to run away from home. It only fills their parents with false hope.
@flashember: Me, 1st day as a geographer: ice is lonely water Senior geographer: what M: and rain is happy water S: no M: fog is ghost water S: pls stop
@notacroc: Nurse: we need to draw some blood Me with a fine arts degree: *hastily reaches into backpack* i saved my good marker for this