@shawnspree: My condolences for you and your family through this difficult transition is why my wife won't let me send back wedding RSVP cards.
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@panmidwest: HER: why do you hate every single Hugh Grant movie? ME: i love love actually actually
@BooFricketyHoo: That awkward moment when you are introduced to someone and you have no idea if that person is their child or their spouse.
@noneofyours99: * thinks of a tweet before falling asleep * decided to remember a "key word* so I can remember it * wakes up * forgot key word