@OBiiieeee: My dog and I are just drivin around, listenin to music and OMG DOG DO YOU EVEN HAVE A LICENSE? PAWS AT 10 AND 2. DO NOT FOLLOW THAT SQUIRREL
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@Dana_Bruno: What's that thing called where every time you stand up you have to limp for the first minute? Oh yeah…39
@Mindless4Miles: Before seeing why your toddler has been quiet for 10 mins it's best to first call the plumber and write your apology letter to the landlord.
@baconacid: *drops mic* *drops mic* *drops mic* *drops mic* *drops mic* *drops mic* *drops mic* *drops mic* Octopus after owning some1 in a rap battle
@therealeatwood: CAPT. AMERICA: Merry Christmas, Hulk! Happy Hanukkah, The Thing! Er… what religion are you, Thor? THOR: Do you understand I’m an actual god