@dshack8: My dog reacts to the vacuum cleaner the same way I react when my wife says "We need to talk".
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Thynebear: Does the defense have any last words? "Yes I do your honor... THE FLOOR IS MADE OF LAVA" [Judge & jury scramble to get on top of tables]
@Book_Krazy: OUR KID WAS SOAKING WET WHEN YOU BROUGHT HIM HOME FROM SCHOOL! Me: [water pouring from backseat] Listen, this car pool thing was your idea
@JennyJohnsonHi5: I love the Olympics, but missing Dateline due to the Olympics sucks. One of these athletes better end up being a serial killer or something.
@ericsshadow: In Hillary's defense. A lot of your friends probably give you $15,000,000 a few times a year and don't expect anything in return.