@RandomlyMJ: My exes new girlfriend has been calling me looking for him for days. It got old. I gave in and sent her the map and shovel.
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@jlock17: I hate when all the silverware is dirty and I'm down to using the giant decorative fork that hangs on the wall.
@ValeeGrrl: Oh, you're about to earn your 3rd master's degree? I'm still working on spelling "bananas" without singing "Hollaback Girl" in my head.
@aveuaskew: Installing home security cameras seemed like a great idea but explaining my dance offs with the dog was something I should've considered.
@vikkaroni: If you wondered if I was on the naughty list this year, I should probably tell you that the best gift I got was a packing peanut.