@o__0Dev: My family is missing that gene that tells you when trash cans are full.
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@JennyJohnsonHi5: I bet the reason Kim Kardashian hasn't named her baby is because she doesn't know she's supposed to.
@jbillinson: Biden: "Guess who just upper-decked the toilet outside the Oval Office?" Obama: "Dammit Joe, I have to live here for two more months"