@_SetTheHook_: My favorite childhood memory is not having a job.
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@margolundy: Please tell me the grounds around mental hospitals have walking trails called psychopaths running through them.
@ieatanddrink: Think I nailed my job interview today because I wore a graduation cap to make it look like I graduated high school
@tastefactory: SOLDIER: Yankee Oscar Uniform Romeo Foxtrot Lima Yankee India Sierra Delta Oscar Whiskey November CAPTAIN: Lima Oscar Lima!
@ItsDanSheehan: When a zoo animal dies they always call it "beloved" or a "crowd favorite" like there's some animal named "Jimmy the zebra everyone hates"