@Mouthy_: My favorite exercise after a heavy meal is regret.
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@meladoodle: Crazy how women have the stereotype of being chatty when 90% of dudes have 45 minute podcasts that no one listens to...
@pabstdriver: I can usually tell how productive I've been at work, by the battery life of my phone.
@brennadine: [In line at Starbucks] [Woman behind me talking] I work in an office with 50% men so- [Excitedly turn around] OMG YOU WORK WITH CENTAURS
@KatWar1: [Enters Building] "Excuse..." *Voice fades* "... anyone..." "... how to..." "... out this..." "... ving door?"