@scorpiusryan21: My friend and I have a pact that if we're not married by age 40, we're going to fist bump and take shots for making good decisions
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JediGigi: Him: How'd you get so cute? Me: I-I-my gosh, I really don't know. I'm not very good at biology.
@KKAlThani: The girl at the table next to me is having a salad. Not as a starter, but as a main course like some kind of rabbit.
@MmeSurly: My kids wouldn't stop asking me who my favorite is so I said the dog & now they're crying and I'm like THIS IS WHY THE DOG IS MY FAVORITE.
@novicefather: Don't be that crazy person who collects cats. Collect something else instead like toenails.