@jumpdashark: My friend called me from a private number last night so I just returned the favor by knocking on his door with a ski mask on.
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@FuckabillyRex: I just saw an old guy pick a rubber glove out of a garbage can and put it on, and I think he might be missing the point of rubber gloves.
@mooturkey: I used a fax machine today!! I also ran all the cotton thru the gin and plowed the field with my oxen while it finished dialing up.
@laureneoneal: Why doesn't anyone invite copyeditors to parties when we're such cool people out with whom to hang?