@TrueTorontoGirl: My friend is looking for a single, normal, well adjusted man. I told her to avoid twitter.
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@Matt_The_1st: Me: But where do you see this relationship in five years? Her: Sir! For the last time, do you want extra cheese or not?
@Mikel_Jollett: Instagram: My life is a party. Snapchat: My life is a quirky tv show Facebook: My life turned out great! Twitter: We're all going to die.
@tchrquotes: Parenting is basically telling your kids they need to eat more fruit then telling them to quit eating all the fruit.