@zachreinert03: My friends holds her breath driving past cemeteries cause of superstition but I thought she just didn't want to be cocky about breathing
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@chuuew: ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter] EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone? ME: You must be new here.
@zachreinert03: I only eat free range chicken because I only eat food that was given the illusion of freedom before it was murdered
@bobvulfov: One time i saw a man eat a whole apple, core and everything. Motherboard and power supply too. The man ate a computer it was horrifying