@cupcakelynda: My hobbies include but are not limited to getting drunk and commenting "LOL" on relationship statuses on Facebook.
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@charstarlene: I can't wait to get married and communicate my disdain solely through aggressive dishwashing.
@trevso_electric: "Jessica wasn't usually dead. So when we found her dead we immediately knew something was wrong." -Investigation Discovery
@jake_likes_naps: HER: [she puts her hand down my pants] mm what do we have in here ME: [sweatin because thats where I keep my chicken mcnugget stash] nothin
@Fred_Delicious: "so doc... am I dying?" "we're all dying, just at different speeds" "but what about me" "You're like, the Usain Bolt of dying dude lmao"