@OhhScarlet23: My husband and I have been in an open marriage for five years. I hope he's ok with it when he finds out.
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@BobTheSuit: CIA: So what did you call that new tracking software we put on everyone's iPhone? NSA: "U2's New Album"
@andyerikson: Give a man a baby, and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to baby, and i think this saying only works for fish actually.
@Jazzzzzmina: Me: I'm so over him Vodka: No you're not, you should text him Me: Really? Vodka: Yes! 25 times
@minnie_in_pink7: Not to brag, but I can cure a man of having a thing for me in five minutes flat.