@OhhScarlet23: My husband and I have been in an open marriage for five years. I hope he's ok with it when he finds out.
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@bacon_gillepic: A client on the phone accidentally said they love me before they hung up Not gonna lie it felt good
@HomeProbably: The human liver can withstand up to 97% damage and make a full recovery. Yet not one doctor will accept this as an argument for alcoholism.
@ConorTripler: my GOTH DAD license plate is not a vanity plate it is a coincidence. random string of letters. could ve happened to a dad without eyeliner
@thatdutchperson: [first date] Her: I just love eating clean and staying healthy, you know? Me:*flashback to the time I cry-ate two lasagnas* Totally