@LurkAtHomeMom: My husband just left town for a work trip. I didn't want him to miss out on anything so I made him a mixtape of the kids whining.
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@PeachCoffin: My grandma had a lock installed on her medicine cabinet poor thing no one's ever going to visit her again
@droidbears: flight attendant: sir, are you raising your hand me: how do i access the wifi fa: im doing safety announcements me: is that lowercase
@my_minivan_life: Someone asked me today what was the toughest thing about being a parent. I would have to say it’s the kids.
@Mr_Kapowski: If you wear a cape to a meal, you can spin it around to the front and have a full sized bib for eating