@LostFelicia: My husband knew he couldn't scare me with that ghost mask, so he held one of my credit cards over the shredder.
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@Ygrene: Oh man almost forgot the trash *takes trash out, a nice little sushi place* This is great *sees wife there with the recycling* WHAT THE HELL
@Donna_McCoy: The seance was ruined when everyone realized that the only spirit speaking through me was vodka.
@DurtMcHurtt: This guy in my living room must think I'm an idiot, he says he picked my lock but I distinctly remember choosing it at the store by myself.