@NotThatKristi: My jeans say "no more Christmas goodies" but my leggings are like "we got you, gurrrl"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Fred_Delicious: [Biden runs into the oval office] "Barack, ISIS are on the phone. They want a shipment of updog. I asked what it is but they just laughed"
@thejamietighe: Tried cleaning the house to the A-Team theme and ended up building a tank. So close.
@SaraMansford: Germ 1-OMG he dropped his pizza! Germ 2-PIIZZZAAAA!!! Let's get it! Germ Capt.-Stand back! He still has one more second to pick it up.
@NicestHippo: If you think you're bad with words, imagine the first guy to say "There there" when consoling someone