@sarcasticmommy4: My kids say I need to stop trying to embarrass them but joke's on them because I'm not even trying.
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@juliussharpe: I'll vote for whichever presidential candidate promises to end the banter before two people announce who won an Emmy.
@FrenulumBreve: [Safari hunt] (Ok don't tell them I'm an elephant) *Adjusts hat and shades* "Elephant?. Yes that way." *Points with trunk*
@thenatewolf: *I come downstairs to see my dog has eaten my dinner off the counter* Dude, I said I was sorry for eating yours.
@asimplesean: Grease (1978, musical) A highschool girl wins happiness and the acceptance of her peers by changing who she is and taking up smoking.