@Sean_Hegarty: My laptop has a Miley Virus. It's stopped twerking.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@pplwtching: Ever notice you can hardly touch something that just came off a grill, but yet a fly can land on that MFer like its room temperature?
@InternetHippo: AGE 18: There's someone special out there for you! AGE 28: You'll find them one day! AGE 38: It'll happen! DEAD: Just be patient!
@ThaJawn: "No, there's no way!" I totally could "No you couldn't!" *slams the rest of his beer* I can and I will -the first guy to ride an ostrich
@walks_on_legs: Throwing burgers around furniture because I have a hunch that termites only eat wood because they have not tried anything tastier.