@RandiLawson: My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, but they stay for the intelligent discourse about Benghazi
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@behindyourback: I bet the creator of the artificial heart is pretty pissed that we still use "sliced bread" as our basis for great inventions.
@notalogin: The order the Star Wars movies are being released is based on the order in which Yoda would count from one to nine.
@Amazon_Blonde: No beer or Snacks?!? WORST. PARTY. EVER. Family: uh...this is an Intervention Me: LAME, look, Grandmas so bored she's crying
@aka_fatman: Let's play the Rihanna drinking game! We'll drink a shot of vodka every time she says 'work'. [2 minutes later] *house is on fire*