@smickable: My mom is having a hysterectomy. This is like the time I moved away to college and she tore down my childhood bedroom.
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@myonlymizztake: Billy Joel: You may be right, I may be crazy! But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for... Billy Joel's 3 ex-wives: Yeah. Nope.
@iGreenMonk: Because of Twitter, people use words like Twitterverse, Tweeple, and Twitcide. Which makes me want to twoot myself in the face.
@AngelaEhh: People say to enjoy the messes your kids leave, because you'll miss them when they're grown and gone. I like to call those people liars.
@caliluvgirl77: I can't have a boyfriend because my clean laundry goes on the other side of my bed.