@SnizzleFrizzle: My moral compass must run on solar power, because it never seems to work after dark.
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@ThisOneSayz: "Maybe she's born with it, but most likely she botched it at home" should be my slogan when I color my own hair.
@rolldiggity: Whenever I fill out a job application with a box for "Race," I add a question mark and then write, "Anytime. Anywhere."
@ericsshadow: GUY: my new boss is gay ME: my new bed sheets are warm GUY: [clearly frustrated] what does that have to do with anything? ME: exactly