@hrtbps: My New Year's resolution is *removes sunglasses* 2048x1080. I'll explain. *perches on desk* You see, the word 'resolution' can also refer t
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@jjhartinger: 1995: [goes to store, video is rented] Maybe next time 2017: [netflix takes 5 mins to load] This is a nightmare
@sarcasticmommy4: I hate it when I go to hide out from my kids in the walk-in closet & my husband is already in there hiding out from me.
@Ivsy01: Keep it mysterious, ladies... Him: See you next time. Me: Maybe. Him: Do you want your receipt?
@bigmacher: #MyRoommateIsWeird she keeps having babies and making me take care of them. She also insists I call her 'Wife'