@robdelaney: My niece just said "Birds live in a birdhouse & we live in a people house!" Cute, huh? Wrong; my niece is 26 & on trial for manslaughter.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@heatherlou_: These people act like they've never seen a woman eat a whole rotisserie chicken before.
@AsgardianRose: Harry Potter: A Shortened Version Voldemort: I must kill Harry Potter. Everyone else: Lol, no.
@OutOnTheMoors: Friend celebrated her birthday today by falling off an elephant in Thailand, if you thought I'm the weird one in my circle.
@PajamaBen_: You know what I really like about you, girl? You're really down to earth. *waits for response, nothing. Goes to next tombstone* You know wha