@CackleClub: My right eye wouldn't stop weeping all day until I said BE A MAN YOU FREAK and now it's just drinking beer to hide it's feelings
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@matt_simpson84: Relationship status: went to buy condoms and the cashier just said "yeah right" and put em back on the shelf
@protolalia: If I were Jesus I would be seriously spooked by all the buildings with giant crosses.
@SucculentPizza: Somebody in my gang is an undercover police horse. I've narrowed it down to Dave, Kyle and Sugarcube