@WilliamAder: My second account is trying to drive a wedge of suspicion between me and my Twitter crush.
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@LindaInDisguise: I just opened a marketing email from Fitness magazine and my computer died laughing.
@LostFelicia: Raise your hand if you ever ran out of toilet paper and had to use a coffee filter. So, just me..
@NicestHippo: "Let's go around the room & name our biggest fears" SUPERMAN: Kryptonite BATMAN: Bats MARIO: When a turtle slowly walks in my direction
@WheelTod: [Office meeting] *I stride in, straddle a chair: Yo Guys. Listen up Boss: Turn around Frank. We can't hear you when you're facing the wall