@JermHimselfish: My sense of humor is so dark that my grandmother would have been very unhappy if my sister went on a date with it.
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@bobvulfov: DATE: oh u have an eyelash on ur cheek [picks it up] make a wish ME (under my breath): i wish u wouldn't touch my property
@waydybee: Met this chinese guy with the surname Shen. His name's Eric. As in Eric Shen. Have him for more than 4hours, call a doctor!
@Elizasoul80: I don't blame sharks. If someone walked into my house and started splashing around in my bath, I'd bite their leg off too.