@ShrinkMedia: My son just got his brown belt in Tae Kwon Do. If you threaten him, he bows respectfully before he runs.
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@kristensauce: Things Red Bull has given me: 1) jitters 2) diarrhea 3) a heart attack Things Red Bull has not given me: 1) wings
@BuckyIsotope: My son just asked what erectile dysfunction is so I told him it's when your anaconda don't want none regardless of the presence of buns.
@JanineEB4: My biggest regret to date is probably never telling Kary C, Kerri B, Cari R and Kerry L from 4th grade that their names were spelled wrong..