@SusanandTrixie: My spirit animal is fried chicken
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@kiel_phillips: DOCTOR: I think you have a curvature of the upper spine QUASIMODO: That a diagnosis? D: We need an X-ray to confirm. Right now it's a hunch
@BuckyIsotope: *calls son at college* Pop quiz, son “Ok” What’s the opposite of a hot dog “Um…a cold cat?” Exactly. Now let’s talk about Fluffy
@sixfootcandy: Me: (filling the medicine cabinet with ping pong balls) Him: What are you doing? Me: I invited your family over for dinner tonight.