@AristotlesNZ: My stalker sucks. She needs to try harder. I always have to keep going & finding her. It's like I'm following HER around. It's ridiculous.
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@SteveKoehler22: A young musician left his priceless Stradivarius violin on a train in Germany. But it was returned... no strings attached. Wait...what ?
@sarcasticmommy4: Before you have kids, practice yelling "GET UP NOW OR I WILL TAKE YOU TO SCHOOL IN YOUR PAJAMAS!" & see if it's right for you.
@notalogin: After the hipster got his girl pregnant, he wouldn't shut up about how he was into her before she got big.