@AndyAsAdjective: My three biggest fears are mouses, wolfs & proper pluralization.
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@DamonHunzeker: Vader: "I am your father." Luke: "I am your father." Vader: "Stop copying me." Luke: "Stop copying me." Vader: "Shut up." Luke: "Shut up."
@magicraisin: She said: "I want to have your children." . Me: "They'll be on the first bus in the morning."
@Scott_A_Gilmore: Ladies, if he says he would go to the "end of the earth" for you and then he goes missing, check Finland.
@bridger_w: Give yourself something to look forward to tomorrow: Text a friend, "I think you owe me an apology," then turn off your phone and go to bed