@slimmy_shady: My tongue was actually in the Guinness Book of World Records until the damn librarian kicked me out.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Moses: Thanks for the mana in the desert. God: No problem. Moses: But since you can make anything- God: FOR THE LAST TIME, NO PIZZA.
@rsynder336x2: Wife: Can you fix this, the holes too big for the thingy majingy? Me: Hey I know how it feels! Hahaha! *And then I regained consciousness