@TylerLinkin: My uncle was a world-famous chainsaw juggler. For one show.
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@mortimermaiden: *stares lovingly at photo of wife and child* *bravely runs into a burning house* "It's empty!" some yell "That was a stock photo" others say
@michael_raphone: [In the gym] hey guys it'd be a lot easier to lift these weights if we worked together