@4boding: My weekly retreat is simple: driving alone down country roads for a couple of hours with tunes cranked up and singing loudly to livestock.
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@meganamram: I'm donating my body to science. I'm getting sick of it taking up space in the freezer.
@blondecalamity: A) I don't care who is stalking my twitter B) I don't care who is saying terrible things about me C) I don't care - OH! Free iPad??? *click*
@david8hughes: [in church] "And Jesus, our saviour, died on the cross for your sins." [vicar points directly at me & entire congregation collectively nods]