@OleThickHawk: My wife came into my room at the ER and started unplugging stuff and flipping switches until she realized that I had just sprained my ankle.
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@sixthformpoet: I love how people say they're "expecting" a baby, as though it might be something else, like a penguin.
@GrumpyBahr: CW: My wedding is going to be expensive! Me: Wait till you see what the divorce is going to cost you!