@max_pad21: My wife just gave me that come hither look and when I come hithered she pointed to the trash
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@SteveKoehler22: Just changed the GPS voice in my car from male to female. Now if I miss a turn, she says .... "( Sigh )....recalculating"
@JohnDuffy21: Relationships are a lot like algebra.. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
@awesomeseank: Anyone who shows up late to work, wearing shades and clutching a Gatorade is about to tell a lie.
@jake_lach: You think you have your anger issues under control until someone starts telling an important story while they're chewing