@doublewenis: My wife used to get so fat that she had to go to the hospital; then a person would fall out of her. That doesn't sound normal.
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@TravLeBlanc: "What would Jesus do?" is an unfair question. He had superpowers. Your lifeboat is sinking. WWJD? Well, he'd get out and walk to shore. See?
@QwertyJones3: I just battle rapped my 4 year-old and rhymed "take a nap" with "piece of crap" so don't tell me about your parenting skills.
@JohnLyonTweets: Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.