@dumbbeezie: Naked and Afraid but it's just you in someone else's bathroom with a toilet that won't flush
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@SteveSuckington: [blind date] "I'm like, really good at *looks on hand* making the sex" -did you just read that off your hand? "Hey! You're not blind!"
@ShaneKnowsStuff: Wait just a minute! You're not Jennifer Aniston! Oh, you got me with that avi. Well played. I knew it was to good to be true.
@panmidwest: Pro Tip: Make sure you wear your Fitbit on your dominant hand so you get credit every time you lift an ice cream cone to your mouth.