@izrigrod: Naming your cat "Whiskers" is like naming your kid "Eyebrows."
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@Rollmaninoz: I just switched my phone to airplane mode and a small child appeared and started kicking me in the back.
@CodyJP9412: I think one of the toughest parts about growing up is realizing that you don't sweat blue if you drink blue Gatorade.
@seethenare: age 9- *jumps off fences, feels fine* age 19- *jumps off garage on a dare, feels fine* age 39- *takes Aleve cuz I "slept funny"