@Nocturnesthesia: Neighbor may have just called the cops after hearing me yell at the cat for stealing my cheese bread
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@TheDailySchmuck: I'm not racist. Some of my best friends are white such as Joey, Phoebe and Rachel. And I can't forget Chandler.
@lucidchemistry: [in bed] her: u have done this before, right? me: yes, of course. measure twice, cut once her: what? me: what?