@nicfit75: Neighbors having their yearly Xmas party. Not invited again. So don't tell me the screaming drunken outdoor fights don't pay off.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ArfMeasures: PET SHOP OWNER: So would u like a puppy for your son? ME: Yes [home] WIFE: Where's Tommy? ME [with a puppy] ok so they offered me this deal
@pmann555: They say it's not the destination, it's the journey.........Except when you're heading to the bathroom with diarrhea...
@rickolantern: Me: I snuck in my own candy and a drink Her: This is a funeral home Me: Without a snack bar
@PaperWash: [mugger trying to snatch Elsa's purse] Elsa: HEY LET IT GO! Mugger: OMG sing the rest